The Long Winter #90
Art School Girl part four
“You should probably not be flirting with someone else when you’re dating Becca Ford.”
Penny gasped and turned to see Shawn standing there with part of a smile on her face. The blonde girl took a sip of the brown liquor from the snifter in her hand and nodded in Delaney’s direction.
“You’re being observed, you know.”
Penny frowned back at her.
“If by “observed” you mean “spied on,” then—“
“Then nothing. Look, you have to have heard by now that your girlfriend has something of a reputation.”
Penny crossed her arms. She was glad she had eschewed alcohol and could meet Shawn’s Arctic blue eyes without wavering.
“It’s a dangerous game you’re playing.”
“I’m not playing anything. Becca wouldn’t hurt me. She’s helped me, rescued me, in fact, from being hurt.”
Shawn smiled back. “Well. Just so long as you know what you’re doing.”
“I know what I’m doing.”
“Just so long as you do. Enjoy the party.” She smirked at Penny and left.
Penny stuck her tongue out at Shawn’s back and then a familiar arm was around her shoulder. Penny turned and wrapped her arms around Becca, breathing in her scent, feeling the warmth of her body so close.
“Fuckin’ Shawn, right?”
“I guess. She seems to care about all of us, at least…”
Becca shoved Penny back an arm’s length and glowered at her.
“You think that fucking gossip was caring? That was dirt, mudslinging. At best she’s a fucking busybody.”
Penny nodded and glanced away, watching Shawn navigate the rest of the crowd. On this particular night she had arranged karaoke, and two girls were working their way through a drunken rendition of Bad Romance in the largest room in the house while a half dozen cheered and another half dozen jeered. And Shawn walked between them all, greeting each of them, showering them with sage or unwanted advice and, yes, spreading gossip. She greeted every one of them warmly, and they smiled and spoke with her in return. Penny decided to pretend to agree with Becca’s assessment.
“Neh…”
Becca snorted and sipped her beer. Delaney walked by with Lin. The auburn-haired girl looked over as she passed, unable to stop herself from making momentary eye contact with Penny. Her eyes snapped up to Becca’s and she turned away from the blonde girl’s glare.
“What the fuck is that girl’s problem?” Becca muttered into her beer. Then she saw the confusion in Penny’s eyes. “What the fuck is your problem? I thought you two were broken up months ago. What the fuck is this? Are you going to give me a reason to make a scene?”
“No, of course not. Delaney’s with Lin anyway, neh? We never see each other, so it’s kind of weird, I guess—“
“Kind of weird, don’t give me that shit.” Becca set her beer down and slumped against the wall with her arms crossed. “If it was kind of weird Shawn wouldn’t have accused you two of flirting with each other. I wouldn’t have actually seen you two flirting with each other, the second time in a week! As it stands I’m trying real hard right now not to turn this into a fight.”
“Why fight it? If you want to fight, we can do that. I’ve been learning how to stand up for myself with Agent Marcotte. I think I could do pretty well.”
Becca scowled at Penny.
“I’d much rather do other things with you than fight, though.” Penny smiled at her, running the backs of her fingers up Becca's belly.
“You think you’re handling me pretty well, don’t you?”
“Well, you haven’t started screaming or hitting me, so I must be doing something right, neh?”
Becca rolled her eyes and looked down into her empty bottle.
“I’m getting another. Go sign up for a song and get your turn over with.”
“I haven’t sung karaoke in years!” Penny’s face lit up in a bright smile and she turned to walk beside Becca towards the karaoke machine. “When Shawn told me what was going on tonight I was so excited!”
“Yeah, yeah, just sing your fuckin’ song and get it over with.”
Penny’s smile faltered and she nodded. “Yes, okay…”
Becca sped away and Penny slowed to a stop. Shawn emerged from the crowd and came up beside her.
“Trouble in paradise?”
“No, of course not.”
“Looks like there is. She’s a jealous soul with violence in her heart.”
“She’s not. We’re falling in love and sometimes it’s messy.”
Shawn stepped in front of her, too close, and lowered her voice.
“Messy or not, if things go bad you can trust me to help you. If I thought you were trouble for her I would tell her the same thing, and I still might given your relationship to The Best Defense. But you have my number.”
“Why does everyone want to tell me to stay away from her? Why is everyone so afraid she’s going to hurt me? It’s ridiculous. She hasn’t said or done anything to me to make me think she’s the way you’re saying she is.”
“She has a history—“
“I heard. But it’s still all just rumors.”
“So you’re content to go with her until she does something. And when it happens?”
“You mean if.”
“I mean when. When it happens, you can call me. Any time. Any day. If I can’t get to you to help you I’ll make sure I can send someone. Regardless what some of the bitches here think or say about me, I organize these things to make sure we have support, because if we don’t support each other no one will. Not the University’s trans-pandering Alphabet Society, not the cops, and most assuredly not the males around us.”
Penny nodded and Shawn stepped back from her. “Let’s go find Becca. I’ll see to it she gets you a drink. Who knows? Maybe I’m wrong and you two will be the perfect couple. I’m certainly hoping for that outcome.”
“Thank you, Shawn.”
“You’re welcome. Now come along…”
***
Delaney took the microphone and the soft guitar began playing over the speakers.
“Boo!” yelled one of the girls, invisible behind the bright lights shining on Delaney.
“None of that soft shit!” shouted another to a chorus of laughter.
Delaney ignored them, casting a shy smile at Penny as the half-Asian girl walked through the room just before tiptoeing through the opening lines of The Girl from Ipanema. Her soft voice suited the subdued melody, it was one of the few songs she liked singing in her car when she was alone on the long drive to and from her hometown. Her high school friend had complimented her on it, something that kept a smile on her face, and halfway through the song Lin appeared, leaning in the threshold behind the group of girls whose jeers had become silent awe. She finished the song as Penny reappeared with her angry new girlfriend and she forced herself to smile at Lin. She set the microphone back in its stand and jumped in surprise at the raucous cheers her rendition had earned. It seemed the entirety of the house was crowded room. She offered them a shy “thank you” and stepped down, the young man running the machine shaking her hand as she passed.
She hesitated before heading back to Lin’s side. It had been an odd week. She woke up in the hospital the morning after her drugging and when the police came she could not say much more than the wine made her sick. Lin told her about the conversation she had with Shawn that night and ever since panic ran hot beneath the cold surface of her skin. She thought she saw Tammy twice, once waiting outside Palmer Hall after her classes finished. She ended up detouring to a different exit. The second was that morning at a gas station as she filled up her car. Tammy put his right beside hers and began filling up.
“Hey there, I didn’t see what happened to you at the gallery.”
“Oh, uh, I went back with Lin.”
“With Lin, huh? That lucky girl.”
Delaney nodded and tried to look anywhere else.
“Well, listen, if you’re not busy—“
“I have plans. And tomorrow I’m working.”
“Where do you work? Maybe I can stop by.”
“Oh, I’m all done here. I’m in kind of a hurry, it was nice talking to you, bye.”
Her tank barely more than half full she shoved the nozzle back into place and crawled through the passenger door and over the center console to get to the driver’s seat. The car whirred to life and she raced off, checking the mirror to make sure she would not be followed.
Lin did not make things any easier for her. At first it was nice to have remorseful, obsequious Lin coddling her on her sofabed on Sunday evening. Then she mentioned running into Penny at the gallery and feeling lonely and Lin turned cold and distant. They did not see each other the rest of the week, only exchanging enough texts to confirm their presence as a couple at Shawn’s karaoke extravaganza. And she remained distant that night, especially after witnessing Delaney’s sinful conversation with Penny. She had no smile for Delaney as the auburn haired girl stepped away from the microphone.
“You were good up there,” Lin said as Delaney joined her. “Why don’t you sing more often?”
“I don’t like singing in front of anyone.”
Lin’s blank expression morphed into a frown. “Sure looked like you did…”
“I don’t, usually.”
“Well, I guess it’s easy to like doing something if everyone else likes what you’re doing.”
“Like your painting.”
Lin scoffed at her.
“What?”
“I saw you talking to Penny. Again. Why do you keep talking to her?”
Someone else began singing behind them. It was a song Delaney did not recognize, but the voice was sweet. Not sweet enough to tear her eyes away from Lin and the danger their relationship was in, however.
“We only said hello to each other. Her girlfriend is jealous, too—“
“I am not jealous.”
“You are very jealous.” Delaney’s heart surged triumph at the flustered way Lin scrubbed her hands through her hair, sounds coming out of her throat without forming themselves into words. “It’s rather a nice feeling, having someone be jealous over me.”
“I’m not. Not jealous. Not even… Not even a little.”
Delaney stepped close to Lin, pulled the artist against her.
“If we went upstairs for some privacy you would really fuck me, wouldn’t you?”
Lin’s face was close to hers, her lips parted, her head tilted to the side, just waiting for Delaney to close the last bit of distance.
“I’m not jealous,” Lin whispered. “But I would absolutely fuck you senseless.”
Delaney kissed her, Lin surged forward and they fell against the wall and she heard cheers but was not sure if it was for them or for the singer. Lin’s hands went up Delaney’s face and into her hair, she shoved her fingers through it, pulled Delaney closer, closer, and then they had to stop to breathe.
“Yeah!” shouted a girl.
“What a show!”
“She can sing AND she can cook!”
“What are you waiting for? Get to it!”
Delaney felt her cheeks burn red as Lin stepped back from her and tried to shoo them away.
“You jealous bitches!” Lin shouted back. “You wish you were either of us!”
“I wish I was you!” a girl shoved Lin in return, the girl with wide shoulders and spiky hair and a studded choker around her neck. “How the fuck does a dyke like you get a femme princess like that?”
“Mail order bride, Carla! Go sing your own song!”
There was more laughter and Lin fell back against the wall beside Delaney.
“I guess I forgive you,” Lin muttered.
Delaney smiled back and put her arm around Lin’s waist. They both turned their attention to the microphone as Penny stepped up to take her turn. Instead of some cutesy pop song, heavy guitars signaled the start of something hard and one of the girls in the crowd howled with glee. Penny’s voice joined the guitars and drums and bass and sounded cute, but the juxtaposition was totally suitable to the song. Delaney glanced at Lin, surprised at how the artist was enjoying the performance, tapping her toes and bouncing her head as she was. Delaney looked back on stage and watched for the rest of the song, momentarily wishing she would be the one to greet Penny instead of Becca. But those days were over. Their time was through. She had attained a relationship with Lin The Unattainable, and she knew she should be pleased with that. She held Lin close and kissed her cheek. Lin held her in return. Things were fine. She was happy with what she had. There was no reason to pine after what she could not.
Follow The Long Winter into #91 On Again Off Again part one here.